07-07-07

July 7, 2007.
this kind of thing only happens every 100 years, and is supposed to be a lucky day.
It was my sisters Birthday, she always thought is was a lucky day.

On this day, we lost our baby dog.
this is what I wrote on the 7th. I couldn't eat until finally yesterday, I just felt so nauseated, today is better, but my heart still hurts, and I have all kinds of weird thoughts-- more on that later. maybe I need some prozac.

I am so incredably sad. Our beautiful lab/pit bull is dead because of our stupidity.dh was getting a few things out of the car today, and didn't see that the dog who always wants to go, jumped in. Bradley closed the door, he knew daisey was in the car, but thought dh was going to go on a hike, and take her with him. dh mows the lawn, and then goes to hit a few balls of golf, taking the other car. He had no idea daisey was in the other car.I have been procrastinating going to the store all freaken day. I have been piddling around here, and a couple of times I thought "where is daisey?" Oh, dh must have taken her with him.dh gets home 2 hours later, and asks "where is daisey?"um, I thought she was with you. we both run to the cars because we know she jumps in, and there she was. .......gone. I don't know how long she had been dead, but she was already stiff.ds now thinks it is his fault, he didn't realize she was still in there. I am blaming myself because If I would have just went to the store like I have been planning on all day to get things for our vacation, I would have found her.dh is blaming himself for opening up the car.My heart is so heavy for my little boy, thinking this is his fault. I have been trying to tell him it is not.I am so sick to my stomach. She was such a good dog. dh took her almost everywhere, but not in the summer, beause it is to hot. that dog lived and breathed for dh.He is crying, he took her up on the monument to bury her. I still have not gone to the store, because I am a total wreck right now, and I think our vacation is probabl runied at this point. We were going to leave monday morning.I know it is only a dog, but she was part of our family, and it hurts so bad. I cannot imagine how she suffered, trying to get out, and no one was there to help her. I guess the only thing I can do is have a good cry.